Amenities at Silver Woods

I recently watched “Interstellar” (did you know that if you have some kind of Edgars card or other, you can get your tickets at R33.00? Tangential, but still…) – I completely lost my mind. There’s this scene where Matthew Mcconaughey finds their mother-ship half destroyed and spinning out of control as he attempts to dock the landing pod…I’m sorry, should I have called “spoilers”? My bad. Anyway, my point is, I was hanging on the edge of my seat, I swear I almost fell into the screen, and the Hans Zimmer soundtrack only added to my absolute belief that at that moment, I was in fact in a far distant galaxy next to thriving black hole with nothing but a hope and a prayer…Oh, my bad – “spoilers”. My heart was racing and it was a feeling of excitement I have only felt once before, when upon moving to Pretoria for the first time, I came across the properties of Silver Woods whilst house hunting.

The place is exquisite, with every attention paid to detail in its design and continued growth. The landscape within which residents find themselves in surely reminiscent of the fjords of Norway, such is its splendour and magnificence. The way in which sunbeams penetrates the vast growth of foliage is utterly magical and the translucent green of the leaves tinges the area with a beauty in light that has simply not been found within a residential enclosure before. Why on earth Mr. Mcconaughey ever left Earth in the first place is beyond me (not really, but I wouldn’t ruin the story any further), a simple trans-Atlantic voyage would’ve done the trick just as well as any inter-galactic adventure, Silver Woods surely preferable to the destruction that awaits upon distant worlds in the form of – ah there I go again, “spoilers”. I’ll stop, now, I promise.

However, in staying with the space travel theme, perhaps one of the things that many a space explorer to leave Earth noticed within the two-and-some hours of sheer brilliance that I sat through, compliments of Christopher Nolan, was the absolute lack of anything. I mean, imagine being stranded within an alien solar system, and not being able to have a round of golf to take your mind of the fact that you may never see another human and long as you live. Fortunately that doesn’t seem to be a problem for those living within Boardwalk Manor, as the choice exists between two beautifully cultivated golf courses, Silver Lakes Golf Course, a professional 18-hole piece of paradise that sits within reach of all peoples of the east, and beckons all to experience the majesty of the game in which peaceful solitude is reached in proportions unrivalled by any other activity, save for the far reaches of worlds in galaxies unknown…

The second you ask? For yes, I did indeed mention that there were two. The latter of the two, wouldn’t you know it, also a professional 18-hole course, as designed by Peter Matkovitch (oh, he is also the architect of the aforementioned Silver Lakes Golf Course, did I mention that? No? Well, now you know). Woodhill Country Club is well known for the level to which it tests both the novice and professional golfer, challenging players along the entire range of the skill spectrum to up their game in order to overcome the interesting and well varied course. Certainly more options exist here than ever existed for the Interstellar team of explorers when they first landed on – ah, but I guess you’ll just have to watch the movie.

Though we surely all pray for it day in and day out, golf is not the only thing that there is to life – there are some things that we would definitely prefer not to do, of which shopping is no doubt one of them. And I don’t mean the kind of shopping where your wife walks out of Guess with bags as heavy as your wallet is light, I mean the kind of shopping where it’s the end of the month, there’s an hour before the grocery stores close and you’re stuck in the traffic that exists because everybody is trying to do exactly the same thing that you are – having found precious few hours where no one seeks assistance, attention nor work, we all rush to get the necessary monthly expenditure out of the way so that we may capitalise on what remains, possibly by getting home, putting on our pyjamas and getting straight into bed – alas, it is not to be as we sit in bumper-to-bumper, our blood pressure inversely proportionate to the ever emptying tank of petrol that is being used to stay in one spot (not unlike the fuel issues aboard the “Interstellar”, just FYI)

I am very privileged to be the one to tell you that your worldly woes regarding the commute to distant shopping malls is all but over. With a variety of lifestyle centres within an area radius so small you’d swear you had arrived via wormhole, and including names such as The Grove and Woodlands Boulevard, I have every confidence that you would not need to move a step further than you needed to meet your every desire.

Fellas, I’m sorry, I can’t really do anything about the Guess stores nor their seemingly endless grip on your better halves. Get out those wallets!

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